I've always liked older ladies, ever since my mother would have B'nai B'rith at our house.

I prefer musicals, because I am the best dancer who ever lived. The best plies, the best sashays, and by far the best-smelling Capezios.

We just bought this house. It's too big. It's like 400,000 square feet, or something. We got an indoor lake and ski slope in the house! It's just too big.

I wasn't a kid growing up thinking, 'One day I'll get an Oscar and make a speech.' That wasn't on my mind.

When I'm around the kids I feel like I act the most grown-up just because you're supposed to. And I say things, like every other day, that remind me of my own parents.

I do feel good doing them [family-friendly movies], but it's not going to be my way of life. I'm a comedian.

Well I have a microphone and you don't so you will listen to every damn word I have to say!