I've always had lots of friends and my house was the house they all hung out at.

Back to school, to prove to Dad that I'm not a fool.

Wasted is when you have a hankering for ice cream.

My buddies, we've always just tried to make each other laugh. I mean, just like all friends hanging out - that's the goal.

Chemistry can be a good and bad thing. Chemistry is good when you make love with it. Chemistry is bad when you make crack with it.

I was a coin collector.I didn't know I was nerdy at the time until I felt my 16-D Mercury Dime that was in uncirculated condition might be a panty dropper, and it turned out not to be. Then I stumbled into skateboarding, which kind of was cooler. But I wasn't aware of what was cool. My dad wasn't around so he couldn't shake me and say, 'Drop the coin collecting bit. It's not where you want to go.' So, that and the spelling bee and the chess, I think I had it figured out for myself.

The only reason I got into stand-up was because my brother told me to. I had no idea what I was going to do with my life. I was 17 and my brother went to a comedy club and he said - you can do that.