He put Ben Gay inside my jock strap and filled my tooth paste tube up with glue.

I dated Siamese twins, I slept with Big Foot, too. Get me on Sally Jesse, put me on Donahue.

Right now I'm listening to a lot of Top 40 music, because THAT'S MY JOB.

Left all my Beatle records out in the sun, got a coke bottle stuck on the end of my tongue.

What kind of morons do you have working at newspapers in Austin that would base an entire review of an artist's performance on whether or not they had a good seat?

You still have Top 40 radio now, but it's 40 different stations. There aren't many hits that everybody knows, and there aren't many real superstars.

As a kid, I certainly never thought I would get to spend my life doing something fun.