Children learn how to make good decisions by making decisions, not by following directions.

If children feel safe, they can take risks, ask questions, make mistakes, learn to trust, share their feelings, and grow.

A preoccupation with achievement is not only different from, but often detrimental to, a focus on learning. Thoughts and emotions while performing an action are more important in determining subsequent engagement than the actual outcome of that action.

We can't value only what is easy to measure; measurable outcomes may be the least important results of learning.

Some who support [more] coercive strategies assume that children will run wild if they are not controlled. However, the children for whom this is true typically turn out to be those accustomed to being controlled— those who are not trusted, given explanations, encouraged to think for themselves, helped to develop and internalize good values, and so on. Control breeds the need for more control, which is used to justify the use of control.

If unconditional love and genuine enthusiasm are present, praise isn't necessary. If they're absent, praise won't help.

Sometimes we have to put our foot down, ... but before we deliberately make children unhappy in order to get them to get into the car, or to do their homework or whatever, we need to weigh whether what we're doing to make it happen is worth the possible strain on our relationship with them.