Success is like winning the sweepstakes or getting killed in an automobile crash. It always happens to somebody else.

Do not make a stingy sandwich; pile the cold cuts high; so you should see salami coming through the rye.

The head coach don't want no sissies, so he reads to us from something called Ulysses.

Grandma cheated whenever she could. She cheated because it was a much more scientific and surer way of winning than trusting to luck.

A committee is a group of individuals who all put in a perfectly good color, and it comes out gray.

Success is like winning the sweepstakes or getting killed in an automobile crash. It always happens to somebody else.

The difference between reality and unreality is that reality has so little to recommend it.