I think over there in Montreal they're a bit hardcore with the old homos. They're not that keen on them.

I've met Nicole Kidman, Elton John, loads of people.

I like old people falling over, that's what makes me laugh.

I didn't really want to be a comedian.

The whole business of smoking is like forcing yourself to wear tight shoes just to get the pleasure of taking them off.

I was quite pleased that Prince Philip didn't say anything like, I hate queers! He was quite well behaved.

A lot of comedians, when they have a bad gig, will blame everything but themselves. They'll blame the crowd, or the room was wrong, it had a weird vibe, or the promoter promoted a weird atmosphere.