LINEN, n. "A kind of cloth the making of which, when made of hemp, entails a great waste of hemp."

The natural equipment to accomplish some small part of the meaner ambitions distinguishing able men from dead ones. In the last analysis ability is commonly found to consist mainly in a high degree of solemnity.

UNIVERSALIST, n. One who forgoes the advantage of a Hell for persons of another faith.

ELEGY, n. A composition in verse, in which, without employing any of the methods of humor, the writer aims to produce in the reader's mind the dampest kind of dejection.

Land: A part of the earth's surface, considered as property. The theory that land is property subject to private ownership and control is the foundation of modern society, and is eminently worthy of the superstructure.

Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.

Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance.