Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.

VANITY, n. The tribute of a fool to the worth of the nearest ass.

REPLICA, n. A reproduction of a work of art, by the artist that made the original. It is so called to distinguish it from a "copy," which is made by another artist. When the two are mae with equal skill the replica is the more valuable, for it is suppose

TABLE D'HOTE, n. A caterer's thrifty concession to the universal passion for irresponsibility.

An immaterial but visible being that inhabited the air when the air was an element and before it was fatally polluted with factory smoke, sewer gas and similar products of civilization.

SCARABAEUS, n. The sacred beetle of the ancient Egyptians, allied to our familiar "tumble-bug." It was supposed to symbolize immortality, the fact that God knew why giving it its peculiar sanctity.

UGLINESS, n. A gift of the gods to certain women, entailing virtue without humility.