DAY, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. This period is divided into two parts, the day proper and the night, or day improper - the former devoted to sins of business, the latter consecrated to the other sort.

Cat: a soft indestructible automaton provided by nature to be kicked when things go wrong in the domestic circle.

Experience - the wisdom that enables us to recognise in an undesirable old acquaintance the folly that we have already embraced.

WHANGDEPOOTENAWAH, n. In the Ojibwa tongue, disaster; an unexpected affliction that strikes hard.

Forgetfulness - a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.

In forgiving an injury be somewhat ceremonious, lest your magnanimity be construed as indifference.

Platitude: All that is mortal of a departed truth.