Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.

The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of a remarkable Christian forebearance among men.

MATERIAL, adj. Having an actual existence, as distinguished from an imaginary one. Important.

The quality that distinguishes love without knowledge.

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.

PESSIMISM- philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile.

LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder.