LIAR, n. One who tells an unpleasant truth.

Reverence for the Supreme Being, based upon His supposed resemblance to man. The pig is taught by sermons and epistles / To think the God of Swine has snout and bristles.

TAKE, v.t. To acquire, frequently by force but preferably by stealth.

PLATONIC, adj. Pertaining to the philosophy of Socrates. Platonic Love is a fool's name for the affection between a disability and a frost.

MUSTANG, n. An indocile horse of the western plains. In English society, the American wife of an English nobleman.

SAUCE, n. The one infallible sign of civilization and enlightenment. A people with no sauces has one thousand vices; a people with one sauce has only nine hundred and ninety-nine. For every sauce invented and accepted a vice is renounced and forgiven.

VANITY, n. The tribute of a fool to the worth of the nearest ass.