Alligator: The crocodile of America, superior in every detail to the crocodile of the effete monarchies of the Old World.

ROMANCE, n. Fiction that owes no allegiance to the God of Things as They Are. In the novel the writer's thought is tethered to probability, but in romance it ranges at will over the entire region of the imagination . . .

TABLE D'HOTE, n. A caterer's thrifty concession to the universal passion for irresponsibility.

A person of greater enterprise than discretion, who in embracing an opportunity has formed an unfortunate attachment.

A man is the sum of his ancestors; to reform him you must begin with a dead ape and work downward through a million graves.

Empty wine bottles have a bad opinion of women.

Occident: The part of the world lying west (or east) of the Orient. It is largely inhabited by Christians, a powerful subtribe of the Hypocrites, whose principal industries are murder and cheating, which they are pleased to call war and commerce. These, also, are the principal industries of the Orient.