Optimist – A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.

I think love is the most unbelievable, and critical, thing in civilization. Everything else is very mechanical and predictable, but love, you can't catch it.

Adolescence: A stage between infancy and adultery.

DEPENDENT, adj. Reliant upon another's generosity for the support which you are not in a position to exact from his fears.

What is worth doing is worth the trouble of asking somebody to do it.

REVEILLE, n. A signal to sleeping soldiers to dream of battlefields no more, but get up and have their blue noses counted.

A nutritious substance supplied by a bountiful Providence for the fattening of the poor.