Rum, n. Generically, fiery liquors that produce madness in total abstainers.

Advice: The suggestions you give someone else which you hope will work for your benefit.

EXISTENCE, n. A transient, horrible, fantastic dream,/ Wherein is nothing yet all things do seem:/ From which we're wakened by a friendly nudge/ Of our bedfellow Death, and cry: "O fudge!"

Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.

Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.

New York is too strenuous for me; it gets on my nerves.

PESSIMISM- philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile.