Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.

PIRACY, n. Commerce without its folly-swaddles, just as God made it.

It is evident that skepticism, while it makes no actual change in man, always makes him feel better.

Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

HOMOEOPATHY, n. A school of medicine midway between Allopathy and Christian Science. To the last both the others are distinctly inferior, for Christian Science will cure imaginary diseases, and they can not.

MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.

Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.