ARSENIC, n. A kind of cosmetic greatly affected by the ladies, whom it greatly affects in turn.

Consul - in American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is given one by the Administration on condition that he leave the country.

PROPHECY, n. The art and practice of selling one's credibility for future delivery.

OBSTINATE, adj. Inaccessible to the truth as it is manifest in the splendor and stress of our advocacy.

PHYSIOGNOMY, n. The art of determining the character of another by the resemblances and differences between his face and our own, which is the standard of excellence.

RIBALDRY, n. Censorious language by another concerning oneself.

Certain old men prefer to rise at dawn, taking a cold bath and a long walk with an empty stomach and otherwise mortifying the flesh. They then point with pride to these practices as the cause of their sturdy health and ripe years; the truth being that they are hearty and old, not because of their habits, but in spite of them. The reason we find only robust persons doing this thing is that it has killed all the others who have tried it.