ARSENIC, n. A kind of cosmetic greatly affected by the ladies, whom it greatly affects in turn.

NOUMENON, n. That which exists, as distinguished from that which merely seems to exist, the latter being a phenomenon. The noumenon is a bit difficult to locate; it can be apprehended only by a process of reasoning - which is a phenomenon.

According to the most trustworthy statistics the number of adult Dullards in the United States is but little short of thirty millions, including the statisticians.

Platitude: All that is mortal of a departed truth.

FICKLENESS, n. The iterated satiety of an enterprising affection.

Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.

ZOOLOGY, n. The science and history of the animal kingdom, including its king, the House Fly ("Musca maledicta"). The father of Zoology was Aristotle, as is universally conceded, but the name of its mother has not come down to us.