If you would be accounted great by your contemporaries, be not too much greater than they.

Optimist – A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.

Pun: A form of wit, to which wise men stoop and fools aspire

PROBOSCIS, n. The rudimentary organ of an elephant which serves him in place of the knife-and-fork that Evolution has as yet denied him. For purposes of humor it is popularly called a trunk.

ROSTRUM, n. In Latin, the beak of a bird or the prow of a ship. In America, a place from which a candidate for office energetically expounds the wisdom, virtue and power of the rabble.

Enthusiasm - a distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with outward applications of experience.

PROPHECY, n. The art and practice of selling one's credibility for future delivery.