Reverence for the Supreme Being, based upon His supposed resemblance to man. The pig is taught by sermons and epistles / To think the God of Swine has snout and bristles.

BEGGAR, n. One who has relied on the assistance of his friends.

Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.

I think love is the most unbelievable, and critical, thing in civilization. Everything else is very mechanical and predictable, but love, you can't catch it.

Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it appears to be. It includes the gift of making any color appear white.

PRESENTABLE, adj. Hideously appareled after the manner of the time and place.

STORY, n. A narrative, commonly untrue. The truth of the stories here following has, however, not been successfully impeached.