A violin is the revenge exacted by the intestines of a dead cat.

DISCUSSION, n. A method of confirming others in their errors.

DIGESTION, n. The conversion of victuals into virtues. When the process is imperfect, vices are evolved instead - a circumstance from which that wicked writer, Dr. Jeremiah Blenn, infers that the ladies are the greater sufferers from dyspepsia.

Fidelity - a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.

Book - Learning : The dunce's derisive term for all knowledge that transcends his own impertinent ignorance.

An aged Burgundy runs with a beardless Port. I cherish the fancy that Port speaks sentences of wisdom, Burgundy sings the inspired Ode.

Conversation: A fair for the display of the minor mental commodities, each exhibitor being too intent upon the arrangement of his own wares to observe those of his neighbor.