Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

MONARCH, n. A person engaged in reigning. Formerly the monarch ruled, as the derivation of the word attests, and as many subjects have had occasion to learn.

Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.

Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.

Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo.

Economy, n. Purchasing the barrel of whiskey that you do not need for the price of the cow that you cannot afford.

A penny saved is a penny to squander.