PRESIDE, v. To guide the action of a deliberative body to a desirable result. In Journalese, to perform upon a musical instrument; as, "He presided at the piccolo."

STORY, n. A narrative, commonly untrue. The truth of the stories here following has, however, not been successfully impeached.

EXPOSTULATION, n. One of the many methods by which fools prefer to lose their friends.

OBSOLETE, adj. No longer used by the timid. Said chiefly of words. A word which some lexicographer has marked obsolete is ever thereafter an object of dread and loathing to the fool writer . . .

Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.

Prejudice - a vagrant opinion without visible means of support.

MUGWUMP, n. In politics one afflicted with self-respect and addicted to the vice of independence. A term of contempt.