Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.

WEAKNESSES, n.pl. Certain primal powers of Tyrant Woman wherewith she holds dominion over the male of her species, binding him to the service of her will and paralyzing his rebellious energies.

VANITY, n. The tribute of a fool to the worth of the nearest ass.

MOUSE, n. An animal which strews its path with fainting women.

SCRAP-BOOK, n. A book that is commonly edited by a fool. Many persons of some small distinction compile scrap-books containing whatever they happen to read about themselves or employ others to collect.

Confidante: One entrusted by A with the secrets of B confided to herself by C.

What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.