READING, n. The general body of what one reads. In our country it consists, as a rule, of Indiana novels, short stories in "dialect" and humor in slang.

Spring beckons! All things to the call respond; the trees are leaving and cashiers abscond.

PROPHECY, n. The art and practice of selling one's credibility for future delivery.

Example is better than following it.

Achievement; the death of endeavor and the birth of disgust.

Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.

PALMISTRY, n. The 947th method . . . of obtaining money by false pretences [by] "reading character" in the wrinkles [of] the hand. The pretence is not altogether false. . . for the wrinkles in every hand submitted plainly spell the word "dupe."