I failed first grade, which is my biggest problem. You always feel like a failure, like you're stupid.

More men than women like 'Strangers With Candy'. Pretty girls don't like the show. They don't like to see an ugly lady.

Usually, the best ideas come from other people's good ideas, which then, after a short gestation period, become your ideas.

I don't know my telephone number or anything like that, but when I do have to make a call, I just pull my body over to the side and squat. I don't want to be one of those people who are on their phone all the time.

I don't really consider myself to be a comedian. I mean, it's not like I'm sitting around writing jokes or anything. I just like dressing up and pretending to be other people.

Gay guys know how to craft, and they craft really well. Straight guys, forget it.

I love old cookbooks. I just got such a kick out of them, how the color would be way off or fake looking. The cook books now look so much like magazines, you'll never make food that looks like that. I'd rather see it the ugly way than they way they do it now.