Bacon is clearly a food made by the Nazis to fatten up Americans. It has no nutritional value, is full of fat, sodium, and nitrates, and is a pathetic type of consumable made from the noblest of creatures.

We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers. More college graduates ought to become plumbers or electricians, then go home at night and read Shakespeare.

Unfortunately, propaganda works.

If you do see me in a restaurant, please, just let me eat my dinner.

Numbers are the most certain things we have.

I've learned... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

We're all torn between the desire for privacy and the fear of loneliness.