Before a kid learns how to use a computer that can solve mathematical problems, he or she should know how to do arithmetic without a computer.

Democrats believe people are basically good but must be saved from themselves by the government. Republicans believe people are basically bad but they'll be okay if they're left alone.

Not many people in this world are as lucky as I've been. ... All this time I've been paid to say what is on my mind on television. You don't get any luckier in life than that.

I'd like to be rich enough so I could throw soap away after the letters are worn off

Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.

I don't pick subjects as much as they pick me.

I've learned... that just one person saying to me, 'You've made my day!' makes my day.