With comics, you always talk about a big break, but there are a lot of big breaks in your life and not one of them makes a big difference.

I'm fascinated by offensive subject matter. Always have been. It is very natural to me, as any teach I've ever had growing up could attest.

In a late-night monologue, it's not just about being funny; you have to come off as knowledgeable. You have to cultivate a persona of trust and intelligence and likeability.

Halloween is just a made up holiday, created by the razor blade industry.

Yesterday I accidentally hit a little kid with my car. It wasn't serious — nobody saw me.

It's always difficult when someone close to you passes away. But it's really tough when they're on top of you.

Racist dermatologists think all black people have really bad skin.