I see my large nose, like half an avocado. I broke it falling downstairs when I was six, and it now resembles a large blob of play-dough.

Listening to Chris Moyles on Radio 1 is the most miserable thing any human being can do, but attending awards ceremonies isn't far behind.

My sister-in-law believes that few narratives are so tightly constructed that you can't skip boring bits and still keep abreast of what's going on.

The real change that paintings undergo is in the perceptions of the viewer.

I abhor nothing more than bumping into someone I know on the Tube.

An uninspiring canvas becomes a glamorous masterpiece when it is reattributed to a better-known artist.

I like doing things I haven't learnt about yet. I've always been interested in art, and I love doing art.