Sooner or later, I'll be punctual.

Inform all the troops that communications have completely broken down.

Here is a guaranteed way to get more of what you want: want less.

To always hit the target, throw a dart, then call whatever you hit the target.

The time for action is past! Now is the time for senseless bickering!

I will stop at nothing to reach my objective, but only because my brakes are defective.

We can all learn from our failures. What I've learned is how much it hurts to fail.