Come cook food with me and do nothing.
The hardest part about rollerblading is telling your parents you're gay.
When I bet on horses, I never lose. Why? I bet on all the horses.
Comedians don't have hits. You have to have a whole brand-new hour. You have no hits to rely on.
Everyone just did what their parents did. So that immediately made me skeptical of the whole religion thing, even as a kid. So I never was really into religion as a concept.
Whats the worst that could happen?! The worst that could happen is he could cut off your legs and use them to make stilts that look like legs!