To live in Australia permanently is rather like going to a party and dancing all night with one's mother.

Sex is the most beautiful thing that can take place between a happily married man and his secretary.

There is no more terrible fate for a comedian than to be taken seriously.

I was born with a priceless gift, the ability to laugh at the misfortunes of others.

To live in Australia permanently is rather like going to a party and dancing all night with one's mother.

I have outlived most of my more athletic contemporaries who jogged, golfed and squashed themselves into coronary occlusion.

Sport is a loathsome and dangerous pursuit.