I recently turned fifty, which is young for a tree, mid-life for an elephant, and ancient for a quarter-miler, whose son now says, "Dad, I just can't run the quarter with you anymore, unless I bring something to read."

That's why ears have cartilage, to keep them from flapping.

The three ingredients of a successful union between two ... humor, commitment & undying love.

You know the only people who are always sure about the proper way to raise children? Those who've never had any.

You go and you buy a lottery ticket. You've got just as much chance of getting struck by lightning as you do of winning the lottery.

There are no absolutes in raising children. In any stressful situation, fathering is always a roll of the dice. The game may be messy, but I have never found one with more joys and rewards.

A grandchild is God's reward for raising a child.