I am available for children's parties, by the way.

Sometimes you feel in control, and it's great, but sometimes you just don't feel in control and you really have to struggle to get laughs.

I believe that God left certain drugs growing naturally upon our planet to help speed up and facilitate our evolution.

Your denial is beneath you, and thanks to the use of hallucinogenic drugs, I see through you.

They proved that if you quit smoking, it will prolong your life. What they haven't proved is that a prolonged life is a good thing. I haven't seen the stats on that yet.

People tell me, 'Bill, let it go. The Kennedy assassination was years ago. It was just the assassination of a President and the hijacking of our government by a totalitarian regime - who cares? Just let it go.' I say, 'All right then. That whole Jesus thing? Let it go! It was 2,000 years ago! Who cares?'

I was in Australia....Lotta leg room down under. Apartments: dollar a month. 2000-acre den....think of the parties.