You can’t be a rational person six days a week and on one day of the week, go to a building, and think you are drinking the blood of a two thousand year old space god. That doesn’t make you a person of faith…, that makes you a schizophrenic.

I see they found out the universe is 80 million years older than we thought. It's also been lying about its weight.

We have the Bill of Rights. What we need is a Bill of Responsibilities.

New polls show that Obama is now pulling away from Mitt Romney. And, of course, what could be more natural than to see Mitt Romney and pull away?

This country hates professors. It likes Toby Keith - 'I'm gonna put a boot in their ass.' If you don't do that, somehow you can't be strong.

Maybe a president who didn't believe our soldiers were going to heaven might be a little less willing to get them killed.

This party is just full of children, and someone needs to leave them in a hot car.