You know what happens when windmills collapse into the sea? A splash.

[The Republicans] are always asking the Muslims to denounce their extremists. And I agree with them. But they don't take that note and do it among their own. They don't denounce their own extremists.

I kid the Republicans, with love. I feel bad for them. They got nobody for next time. Who are they gonna run? Sarah Palin, reading off her hand. Did you see that? You saw this? She wrote "tax cuts" on her hand. A Republican so stupid she has to be reminded of the one thing - Tax cuts! This is like if you saw the coyote's paw and it said "Road Runner".

All I did was tell the truth. That's is what the whole show is about! And if Politically Incorrect has to go down for it, so be it!

In the Muslim world, much of it, they cannot conceive of something coming out of the United States that wouldn't be sanctioned by the government, because in their countries, everything is sanctioned by the government.

Recognition is one of the three big elements of comedy.

If Jesus was a Jew, why did he have a Spanish name?