As a loyal American and I think a patriotic American, no, I don't want Sarah Palin to be president.

I think America causes cancer, longevity is less important than fun, and young people should be discouraged from voting.

'The Lorax,'...it's a mythical, woodland creature, right, who's for saving trees. He speaks for the trees because no one else can. Kind of the way conservatives speak for fetuses.

I saw this anti-drug commercial that showed a kid smoking pot in his dad`s room with his friend. This kid finds a gun, the gun accidentally goes off and kills his friend. Only in America is the villain in this commercial not guns or bad parenting, but pot.

I do miss George Bush. Compared to these teabaggers and the people who are pandering to them, he looks like a professor.

There's no greater model, in my view, than Jesus Christ.

The idea that men are from Mars and women are from Venus is a bunch of bullshit. Treat her like you would a friend, and you'll wind up with a lover.