I would jump into the middle of the street and say, "excuse me, there's a Mercedes that's got to get through here." And I would push people out of the way, "get out of the way! Let him through!" Smacking their cars and stuff. Just like, "whack" and you just jump into it.

Half of the people in this room are more dressed up than on any other day in the year, and the other half are more dressed down.

I didn't get into this position by being like a stiff sitting on the set in a folding chair. I did it by walking around on the streets and stirring things up.

I don't have to take this abuse from you -- I have hundreds of people waiting in line to abuse me!

Golf was my first glimpse of comedy. I was a caddy when I was a kid. I was on the golf course rather than being in lessons, but I can play better now than I could then.

The atheists traditionally hold their conventions from Good Friday to Easter Sunday during the hours Christ spent in the grave.

Every moment that you share someone else's pain, feel what they feel, makes you more human.