I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over and over and over?

Awards are meaningless to me, and I have nothing but disdain for anyone who actively campaigns to get one.

Alcohol is really just the liquid version of Photoshop.

Sometimes I snore, like when I get really tired.

I've never made any horrible, horrible movies. If you don't ruin your reputation, you can always get work.

The only good thing about fame that I've gotten is I've gotten out of a couple of speeding tickets. I've gotten into a restaurant when I didn't have a suit and tie on. That's really about it.

Harold Ramis and I together did the ‘National Lampoon Show’ off Broadway, ‘Meatballs,’ ‘Stripes,’ ‘Caddyshack,’ ‘Ghostbusters’ and ‘Groundhog Day.’ He earned his keep on this planet. God bless him.