Everybody I know fails the acid test of friendship.

Calvin: They say the world is a stage. But obviously the play is unrehearsed and everybody is ad-libbing his lines. Hobbes: Maybe that’s why it’s hard to tell if we’re living in a tragedy or a farce. Calvin: We need more special effects and dance numbers.

Know what's weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything's different.

Verbing weirds language.

Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria!

If you're a painter, it's simply taken for granted that you'll spend a lot of time in museums studying great paintings, but if you're a cartoonist, it used to be very hard to see an original cartoon drawing.

Mothers are the necessity of invention.