In the short term, it would make me happy to go play outside. In the long term, it would make me happier to do well at school and become successful. But in the VERY long term, I know which will make better memories.

Calvin: Why are you crying mom? Mom: I'm cutting up an onion. Calvin: It must be hard to cook if you anthrpomorphisize your vegetables.

I'm learning real skills that I can apply throughout the rest of my life...procrastinating and rationalizing.

CALVIN: Our hero regains consciousness at the feet of a sarcastic alien.

I'm learning skills I will use for the rest of my life by doing homework...procrastinating and negotiation.

Calvin:"It says here that 'religion is the opiate of the masses.'...what do you suppose that means?" Television: "...it means that Karl Marx hadn't seen anything yet

It's going to be a grim day when the world is run by a generation that doesn't know anything but what it's seen on TV.