If you're going to do an interview about a movie or anything like that, you're vulnerable. You say stupid things. Or if you're applying for a green card you feel very vulnerable and you're likely to spout out something stupid in the middle of it all.

Tread gently on anyone who looks at you sideways.

[To audience members who were arriving late] You haven't missed a thing, I was just killing time 'til you got here.

Don't work out, work in.

Save the Trees? Trees are the main cause of Forest Fires!

When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here?

There's no such thing as bad weather - only the wrong clothes.