And then there was my mate who'd just been fitted with a brand new hearing aid. "It's the best in the world", he said. "What type is it?", I asked and he said "ten past twelve".

I started to draw desert islands. They were just rough, shapes in the middle of the page. Then I began drawing shapes within those shapes and I was amazed how quickly the islands got better. It took off from there.

I’ve come in and out of America for… well, I’ve lived here for 15 years. And I’ve played here for nearly 30 years. On and off. But I’ve always played to my fan base. And I can come and do two or three nights in New York or two or three nights in L.A., and all that. But when I go away, nobody knows I’ve been gone. You know, I don’t get reviewed or anything like that. So that’s why I’ve come back and done a longer time in a smaller place, in New York. It’s always the people who live here that get a chance to know me.

I'm a huge film star... but you have to hurry to the movies, because I usually die in the first 15 f--ing minutes. I'm the only guy I know who died in a f--ing Muppet movie.

If you haven't heard a good rumour by 11:00am, start one.

When I read 'Be real, don't get caught acting,' I thought, 'How the hell do you do that?'.

I love Los Angeles. It reinvents itself every two days.