Who discovered we could get milk from cows, and what did he think he was doing at the time?

If I had a hammer, there'd be no more folksingers.

All anyone really needs to know about barbed wire is that it can tear the arse out of your trousers, give a cow a good fright, entangle a Yorkshire terrier for life, and is nasty stuff made by greedy men.

I loved Japan. I used to read a lot about it when I was a child. And I always wanted to go. And it was delightful. I absolutely loved it. What a smashing place.

It seems to me that Islam and Christianity and Judaism all have the same god, and he's telling them all different things.

People who announce they are going to the toilet. Thanks that's an image I really didn't need.

I can't believe in Christianity, but I think Jesus was a wonderful teacher.