I loved Japan. I used to read a lot about it when I was a child. And I always wanted to go. And it was delightful. I absolutely loved it. What a smashing place.

The great thing about Glasgow is that if there's a nuclear attack it'll look exactly the same afterwards.

Did your mother never tell you not to drink on an empty head?

Don't die until you're dead.

Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes!

I'm a citizen of the world. I like it that way. The world's a wonderful. I just think that some people are pretty badly represented. But when you speak to the people themselves they're delightful. They all want so little.

If Jesus was a Jew, how come he has a Mexican first name?