If something smells bad, why put your nose in it?

One's too many and a hundred's not enough.

Jerry: Oh, you don't understand, Osgood! Ehhhh... I'm a man. Osgood: Well, nobody's perfect.

The forest of Compiegne. Look at it. Like a kind grandmother dozing in her rocking chair. Old trees practicing curtsies in the wind because they still think Louis XIV is king.

Don't be too clever for an audience. Make it obvious. Make the subtleties obvious also.

If there's anything I hate more than not being taken seriously, it's being taken too seriously.

I had one life. And what did I do? Wasted it in some palooka preliminaries in Spain, just before Hitler and Chamberlain warm up for the main event.