I've been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.

When you get over 95, every day is your day.

She spoke perfect English, which led to considerable trouble. She couldn't understand us at all.

Personally, I never drink on Oscar nights, as it interferes with my suffering.

When they asked Jack Benny to do something for the Actor's Orphanage - he shot both his parents and moved in.

I've never wanted an Oscar, although they are reassuring to an actor who doesn't know how really great he is.

If they liked you, they didn't applaud -- they let you live.