When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.

My folks were English . . . we were too poor to be British.

You know, marriage is making a big comeback. I know personally that in Hollywood people are marrying people they never married before.

Golf is my real profession. Entertainment is just a sideline. I tell jokes to pay my greens fees.

As the colonel and I sat swapping stories in the plane, a jet aircraft buzzed past our window. I asked the colonel what type of aircraft it was, and he said, "Don't worry about it, Bob. . . if you can see it, it's obsolete."

Ronald Reagan is not a typical politician because he doesn't know how to lie, cheat, and steal. He's always had an agent for that.

Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.