If my golf game was a prize fight, they'd stop it.

I don't know if the presidential candidates are running for the White House or Animal House.

Bing Crosby and I play a lot of golf together and I have a small course at my place where we often play for side stakes. The only troulbe is that when I win, I always have to engage and attorney before I can draw the money.

I led such a sheltered life I didn't go out with girls until I was almost four.

You know what a fan letter is - it's just an inky raspberry.

America is a country where the Olympics and the divorce lawyers both have the same slogan - Go for the Gold.

We flew over to England by the same route Churchill took. It was easy. All we had to do was follow the cigar ashes.