Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.

The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.

It's a wonderful world. It may destroy itself but you'll be able to watch it all on TV.

All British castles and old country homes are supposed to be haunted. It's in the lease.

Everyone's nervous these days. Ronald McDonald has hired six bodyguards, and that's just to protect his buns.

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water.

It's so cold here in Washington, D.C., that politicians have their hands in their own pockets.