Please don't stand up on my account.

Culture is the ability to describe Jane Russell without moving your hands

Whenever I play with him , I usually try to make it a foursome - the President, myself, a paramedic and a faith healer.

If he slices the budget like he slices a golf ball, the nation has nothing to worry about.

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?

One of the greatest gifts to mankind is laughter, and one of the greatest gifts to laughter is Lucille Ball. God has her now but thanks to television, we'll have her forever.

The best thing about growing older is that it takes such a long time.